Typing Derby Paragraph Megathread

Suggestions Boardwalk Games Suggestions
26

Welcome to Team Fortress 2. After 9 years in development, hopefully it would have been worth the wait. To listen to a commentary node, put your cross hair over the floating commentary symbol and press your primary fire. To stop a commentary node put your cross hair over the rotating node and press the primary fire again. Some commentary nodes may take control of the game in order to show something to you. In these cases, simply press your primary fire again to stop the commentary. Please let me know what you think after you’ve had a chance to play. My favorite class is the Spy. Thanks and have fun!

6 Likes
27

When misrule takes its place at the eight corners of the world.When the Brass Tower walks and Time is reshaped.When the thrice-blessed fail and the Red Tower trembles.When the Dragonborn Ruler loses his throne, and the White Tower falls.When the Snow Tower lies sundered, kingless, bleeding.The World Eater wakes, and the Wheel turns upon the Last Dragonborn.

1 Like
28

Any sufficiently large software project is almost guaranteed to include multiple defects. Finding and fixing defects is one of the main tasks of software development. Therefore, any techniques which can make defect correction more efficient is valuable to a developer. Software defect prediction is the use of models to detect the modules in a system that are most likely to have defects. This allows quality assurance to focus their resources on troublesome modules while preventing resources from being wasted on defect-free modules. Defect prediction is not without flaws. The best models require data from similar projects or earlier versions of the same project in order to train, and most cross-project models do not yet perform satisfactorily.

1 Like
29

James Hook, thou not wholly unheroic figure, farewell.For we have come to his last moment.Seeing Peter slowly advancing upon him through the air with dagger poised, he sprang upon the bulwarks to cast himself into the sea. He did not know that the crocodile was waiting for him.As he stood on the bulwark looking over his shoulder at Peter gliding through the air, he invited him with a gesture to use his foot.It made Peter kick instead of stab.At last Hook had got the boon for which he craved.“Bad form,” he cried jeeringly, and went content to the crocodile.Thus perished James Hook.

1 Like
30

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

11 Likes
31

When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

7 Likes
32

Hello, how are you doing? Yes, you. The you who is currently typing this paragraph out. You’re typing quite quickly, I see. Would it be wrong to throw in some long words? I’d rather not spontaneously disambiguate the nonsense presented within each concurrent statement made herein, after all. Or would you like smaller words? I do like it when I can type a lot of words very fast. You know factorials, right? That’s where 4! is equal to 4 times 3 times 2 times 1. The result is 24. Well, I’d say that this has been fun. Hopefully you performed well! With that, I’ll see you off.

8 Likes
33

You wanna know how I got these scars? My father, was a drinker, and a fiend. And one night, he goes off crazier than usual. Mommy grabs the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn’t like that. Not. One. Bit. So, me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me and say, why so serious? He comes at me with the knife. Why so serious? Sticks the blade in my mouth. Let’s put a smile on that face! And. Why so serious?

5 Likes
34

Hey, you. You’re finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there. Damn you Stormcloaks. Skyrim was fine until you came along. Empire was nice and lazy. If they hadn’t been looking for you, I could’ve stolen that horse and been half way to Hammerfell. You there. You and me – we should be here. It’s these Stormcloaks the Empire wants.

9 Likes
35

Moved to Site-19. Origin is as of yet unknown. It is constructed from concrete and rebar with traces of Krylon brand spray paint. SCP-173 is animate and extremely hostile. The object cannot move while within a direct line of sight. Line of sight must not be broken at any time with SCP-173. Personnel assigned to enter container are instructed to alert one another before blinking. Object is reported to attack by snapping the neck at the base of the skull, or by strangulation. In the event of an attack, personnel are to observe Class 4 hazardous object containment procedures.

2 Likes
36

Diane, my recorder is on the table. I’m unable to reach it at this time. I can only hope that I inadvertently pressed the voice activation button. I’m lying on the floor of my room. I’ve been shot. There’s a great deal of pain and a fair amount of blood. Fortunately I was wearing my bulletproof vest last night per bureau regulations when working undercover. I remember folding the vest up trying to chase down a wood tick. If you can imagine the impact on your chest of three bowling balls dropped from the height of about nine feet, you might begin to approximate the sensation.

1 Like
37

It’s 3:30 AM, i’m all alone and the only light is the warm glow coming from my monitor. My hand does a repetitive motion approximately every 5 seconds as it desperately summons the warm and welcoming sound of slots. But then a horrifying sound plays, a wheel spins and my attention focuses on the tiny arrow on top. The wheel slows down, teasing the arrow to land on the forbidden spot. My heart stops as the arrow responds to the teasing, i close my eyes as a orgasmic pleasure surges throughout my body. But when i open them, i’m in my bed, it’s 9:00 AM and the sun gently beams through my window. Tears stream down my face.

3 Likes
38

Ancient Rome was the center of one of the largest and most powerful empires in history. With its center in today’s Italy, the Roman Empire conquered the whole Mediterranean region and spread its influence to the Middle East, Northern Africa, Western and Central Europe. It reached the height of its power between 100 and 200 AD. Afterwards the Roman Empire began to collapse because it became too big to rule. The West Roman Empire ended in 476 AD when Germanic tribes invaded, while the East Roman Empire continued to exist for many centuries.

1 Like
39

Dave is considered to be the Overlord of Tower. He has only begun manifesting in a physical form starting in late September of 2018. Dave is a multi-colored bundle of love and cheer, and grants riches and happiness upon those who embrace his form. If you see Dave, rest assured that even if he doesn’t notice you, you will be blessed with his positive mental outlook on life.

2 Likes
40

Rush - 2112 - [III. Discovery] - 106 Words

Behind my beloved waterfall, in the little room that was hidden beneath the cave, I found it. I brushed away the dust of the years, and picked it up, holding it reverently in my hands. I had no idea what it might be, but it was beautiful. I learned to lay my fingers across the wires, and to turn the keys to make them sound differently. As I struck the wires with my other hand, I produced my first harmonious sounds, and soon my own music! How different it could be from the music of the Temples! I can’t wait to tell the priests about it!

1 Like
41

“Stuffing your face as usual.” “I gotta have a good meal.” “Garfield you fat cat. You are so big and fat. Why are you so fat?”
“I eat, Jon. It’s what I do. It’s time to kick Odie off the table.”
“Don’t do it Garfield, that’s our pet dog Odie.”
“You’re going into orbit, you stupid mutt!”
“Garfield!”
“Time for a nap. I’m a cat who loves to snooze.”
“Garfield, you lazy cat.”
“I hate alarm clocks. I’m hungry. I want some lasagna.”
“You’re eating us out of house and home, Garfield.”
“Enough with the chit chat, let’s get some grub going.”
“Where are the three cheese pizzas?”
“I ate them.”
“Where are the taco shells?”
“I ate them.”
“You’re such a bad kitty, that’s it. I’ve had it with you, that does it. I’m done, that’s the last straw, Garfield.”

5 Likes
42

Rush - 2112 - [IV. Presentation] - 72 Words

In the sudden silence as I finished playing, I looked up to a circle of grim, expressionless faces. Father Brown rose to his feet, and his somnolent voice echoed throughout the silent Temple Hall. Instead of the grateful joy that I expected, they were words of quiet rejection! Instead of praise, sullen dismissal. I watched in shock and horror as Father Brown ground my precious instrument to splinters beneath his feet.

1 Like
43

Rush - 2112 - [V. Oracle: The Dream] - 103 Words

I guess it was a dream, but even now it all seems so vivid to me. Clearly yet I see the beckoning hand of the oracle as he stood at the summit of the staircase. I see still the incredible beauty of the sculptured cities, and the pure spirit of man revealed in the lives and works of this world. I was overwhelmed by both wonder and understanding as I saw a completely different way to life, a way that had been crushed by the Federation long ago. I saw now how meaningless life had become with the loss of all these things.

1 Like
44

Rush - 2112 - [VI. Soliloquy] - 83 Words

I have not left this cave for days now, it has become my last refuge in my total despair. I have only the music of the waterfall to comfort me now. I can no longer live under the control of the Federation, but there is no other place to go. My last hope is that with my death I may pass into the world of my dream, and know peace at last. “Attention all Planets of the Solar Federation, we have assumed control.”

1 Like
45

Half-life plot - Words: 74

At the Black Mesa Research Facility, physicist Gordon Freeman is involved an experiment that accidentally opens a portal to another dimension, Xen. Fending off hostile aliens and US Marines sent to cover up the incident, he helps the scientists launching a satellite rocket and travels through a portal to Xen, where he destroys the Nihilanth, an alien entity. He is forced into a contract by the mysterious G-Man, who has been watching his progress.

3 Likes