Typing Derby Paragraph Megathread


#1

Hey all! Want to contribute some paragraphs to Typing Derby? Now you can.

Simply reply to this topic with a paragraph, and if it fits inside of our guidelines, we will add it to the database. Please keep individual paragraphs on individual posts. If the paragraph is added to the database, I’ll heart it so that you’ll know it was accepted. We will have final say over what is inserted.

General rules are:

  • Keep each paragraph between 60 and 120 words.
  • English Only Please
  • Nothing Explicit or containing Hate Speech.
  • Paragraphs must be grammatically correct.
  • Do not create new lines in your paragraphs.

Open Typing Derby Database
pinned #2

#4

Welcome. Welcome to City 17.
You have chosen, or been chosen, to relocate to one of our finest remaining urban centers. I thought so much of City 17 that I elected to establish my Administration here, in the Citadel so thoughtfully provided by Our Benefactors. I have been proud to call City 17 my home. And so, whether you are here to stay, or passing through on your way to parts unknown, welcome to City 17. It’s safer here.


#5

An average professional typist types usually in speeds of 50 to 80 wpm, while some positions can require 80 to 95 (usually the minimum required for dispatch positions and other time-sensitive typing jobs), and some advanced typists work at speeds above 120 wpm. Two-finger typists, sometimes also referred to as “hunt and peck” typists, commonly reach sustained speeds of about 37 wpm for memorized text and 27 wpm when copying text, but in bursts may be able to reach much higher speeds.


#6

It is your thirteenth birthday, and as with all twelve preceding it, something feels missing from your life. The game presently eluding you is only the latest sleight of hand in the repertoire of an unseen riddler, one to engender a sense not of mirth, but of lack. His coarse schemes are those less of a prankster than a common pickpocket. His riddle is Absence itself. It is a mystery dispersing altogether, like the moon’s faint reflection, with even one pebble of inquiry dropped in its black well. It is the most diabolical riddle of all.


#7

Hello Caboose700!

Typing derby is fun, but unfortunately it is a bit too difficult.
For example, I am Dutch, and I find some English words quite difficult.
So please make it a little bit easier like before.
I hope you adjust it goodluck!


#8

Dumbledore turned and walked back down the street. On the corner he stopped and took out the silver Put-Outer. He clicked it once and twelve balls of light sped back to their street lamps so that Privet Drive glowed suddenly orange and he could make out a tabby cat slinking around the corner at the other end of the street. He could just see the bundle of blankets on the step of number four.‘Good luck, Harry,’ he murmured. He turned on his heel and with a swish of his cloak he was gone.


#9

Tower Unite is a living, evolving world, fueled by the community. Play online games with your friends or make new friends from around the world! Tower Unite isn’t just a single game, it’s a never ending addiction that will make you loose contact with family and friends because of how great it is!, don’t you see it? this game is great!, it has alot to do so you’ll never have to do anything other than this game again! What are you doing? hey! don’t walk away from the computer! stay with me, stay with us. forever.


#10

Last weekend I had a sleepover with some friends. My parents supplied us with lots of greasy fast food to fuel our evening of festivities. After a few hours we noticed Timmy had begun snoring on the couch! We all agreed to take full advantage of the situation and decided to pull a devious prank.
We unwrapped one of the boneless barbecue rib sandwiches from the fast food restaurant and stuck it in Timmy’s pajama bottoms. When Timmy woke up he found his thighs slathered in sticky crimson residue! He was so scared he was shaking. When he asked what was happening, we told him, “You fell asleep and porked your pants!”

edit: Just realized pork isn’t officially a verb and I’m not sure if this could be considered explicit. Oh well!


#11

Hercule Poirot lay awake staring at the ceiling. Why was the station outside so silent? His throat felt dry. He had forgotten to ask for his usual bottle of mineral water. He looked at his watch again. Just after a quarter past one.He would ring for the conductor and ask him for some mineral water. His finger went out to the bell, but he paused as in the stillness he heard a ting. The man couldn’t answer every bell at once.


#13

It is a period of civil war.
Rebel spaceships, striking
from a hidden base, have won
their first victory against
the evil Galactic Empire.

During the battle, Rebel
spies managed to steal secret
plans to the Empire’s
ultimate weapon, the Death
Star, an armored space
station with enough power to
destroy an entire planet.

Pursued by the Empire’s
sinister agents, Princess
Leia races home aboard her
starship, custodian of the
stolen plans that can save
her people and restore
freedom to the galaxy


#14

It began with the forging of the Great Rings. Three were given to the Elves, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. Seven to the Dwarf-Lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls. And nine, nine rings were gifted to the race of Men, who above all else desire power. For within these rings was bound the strength and the will to govern each race. But they were all of them deceived, for another ring was made. Deep in the land of Mordor, in the Fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron forged a master ring, and into this ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life.
One ring to rule them all.

121 words aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah


#15

When half way through the journey of our life
I found that I was in a gloomy wood,
because the path which led aright was lost.
And ah, how hard it is to say just what
this wild and rough and stubborn woodland was,
the very thought of which renews my fear!
So bitter ’t is, that death is little worse;
but of the good to treat which there I found,
I ’ll speak of what I else discovered there.


#16

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise?

I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic, he could save others from death, but not himself


#19

Rush - 2112 - [I. Overture] - 81 words

My friend Jon always said it was nicer here than under the atmospheric domes of the Outer
Planets. We have had peace since 2062, when the surviving planets were banded together under the Red Star of the Solar Federation. The less fortunate gave us a few new moons.
I believed what I was told. I thought it was a good life, I thought I was happy. Then I found
something that changed it all. “And the meek shall inherit the earth”.


#20

Welcome,little one. This is your first day. Your designation will be RC zero one slash one three eight.
We expect great things from you.
You have been born in dangerous times.A sharp mind can be the key to survival.
But, as often as not, it will be your inherent physical traits that win the day.
And in this regard you will be superior to your more common brethren.
For you are a Commando, an elite unit, something truly special.
Your weapons, your armor,and most importantly,your brothers.
Now, join your pod and embrace your destiny as their leader.
Join Delta Squad.


#21

Please do not add enters for new lines in your paragraphs.


#22


#23

I feel it’s been weeks now, pulling on this lever. Three slots begin spinning; bar, seven, seven. I long for the day I can leave this awful machine that has taken away so many hours from my life. So, I keep spinning and spinning, desperate to get rich. Finally, I get a Spin. I watch the wheel on top of the machine spinning, hoping that it will land on the Jackpot space. 50. I try again and again for weeks and finally, another Spin. The wheel starts turning, and finally, lands on Jackpot. I run out the door, eager to do anything that doesn’t involve RNG. And then I met a cat in a lighthouse.


#24

The Life of Pablo is, accordingly, the first Kanye West album that’s just an album: No major statements, no reinventions, no zeitgeist drug abuse. It’s probably his first full-length that won’t activate a new sleeper cell of 17-year-old would-be rappers and artists. He’s changed the genre’s DNA with every album, to the point where each has inspired a generation of direct offspring, and now everywhere he looks, he sees mirrors. “See, I invented Kanye, it wasn’t any Kanyes, and now I look and look around and there’s so many Kanyes,” he raps wryly on “I Love Kanye.” The message seems clear: He’s through creating new Kanyes, at least for now. He’s content to just stand among them, both those of his own creation and their devotees.